Q&A Portion of a (never been) Beauty Queen

Okay, I admit it. I'm a sucker for beauty pageants. Some feminists group may react about this statement but let me make my point. Though I do not agree in all the aspects of beauty pageants, but I still see it as somehow, a celebration of a woman's beauty and wit.

And let's all admit it. We all go gaga over beauty pageants and most of the time, to the point of taking everything too personally as if these events could instantly solve the world's biggest problems at the moment. Like global warming, perhaps?

The recent outcome of the Miss Universe 2011 in which our representative landed in the 3rd runner-up spot elicited several reactions from our dear kababayans. Even after two weeks, though the heightened emotions have already somewhat dissipated, but the faint reverberations are still there.

So, before the Miss U fever is completely put to  a year of respite, I am having this little experiment. For the sake of experiencing the pressure of the beauty queens during the Q and A portion, let me test myself by answering some of the most over-rated beauty pageant questions. Just for the sake of fairness, I'll write the answer right away after the question is put to mind and I'll give myself 30 seconds to answer each question. 

Okay. Fair enough. Let's start.

• What's the real essence of a woman?

Answer: The extraordinary capacity to nourish a miniature human being inside the womb and deliver it to the world without having to end her influence at that moment of delivery, knowing that it continues in her entire lifetime and the child's lifetime as well, and even generations after that, and the thought that if she traces her roots, she will find another woman at the starting point of her history---that to me is the real essence of being a woman (woah!).

• What would you choose, beauty or brains?

Answer: Can I have both? (Answer not fit for a beauty pageant. I really am undecided over this matter, swear. Okay, next question)

• If you will turn into an animal in your next lifetime, what animal will you choose to be a---......

Answer: Uhm, excuse me. May I interrupt? Are you sure that's a valid question? Just so you know, I am already an animal. That's a basic scientific fact. Elementary science, remember? (Hala! Tinanong mo kasi ay isang Biology teacher eh...'yan tuloy....hahaha.)

• If an astronaut lands in your yard right now, what will you do or ask him?

Answer: I'll ask him to quarantine himself immediately in an isolated room in our house because he might be carrying with him some foreign microorganisms that might be a threat to world safety and security. That's all, thank you. (Sabi nang awat na sa mga questions na may scientific hints eh! Yan tuloy, sapul for the 2nd time!)

• How many islands does Phillipines have?

Answer: I couldn't think of a better answer than the most celebrated, "High tide or low tide?". Oh, wait. Let me change my answer. You mean before the Spratly Islands' controversy or at the moment? I'm sorry I couldn't give you an official number yet. Everything is still under negotiation. I'll let you know.

• If you want to change something about your physical aspect, what will it be and why?

Answer: I think I want to be a little bit taller, less angular...(several seconds interval)...I want my humungous eyebags to be removed...(several seconds interval)...my nose to be slimmer at the bridge...(several seconds interval)...my cheeks to be...Buzzer! Time's up! ( As in time's up na? Nagtanong ka, kaya napa-isip tuloy  ako. Alangan naman na sabihin ko na: "I am very much perfect, thank you very much. And I am happy with my physical perfection."? Kapag nagka-ganun, magmumukha akong katawa-tawa sa harap ng mga judges 'di ba? Kaya nga nagstart ang question sa "if" eh. In short, kung possible, kung may pagkakataon. Pambihira.)

...And for the finale questions, here are two of the most controversial questions posed to our Miss Universe Filipina representatives for last year and just recently. Oh my! I didn't think it would feel like this. Parang totohanan...haha. I'm very much pressured right now. (toink!:D)

• What is your greatest mistake and what did you do to change it?

Answer: My major, major greatest mistake in life is that I feel that there were moments in the past when I didn't do enough and I just gave less than my best. It was not because I felt inadequate or was inadequate but because I was scared that when I realize that I could do so much, that would separate me from the rest and being isolated was one of my greatest fears. But in the recent years, I realized that it's such a ridiculous idea. I've learned and is still trying the concept of humility----that I should not just embrace my weaknesses or my limit but I should also recognize and fully accept, without any qualms, the extent of my capacity. For when used with the right motive and intention, it is my capacity and not my weakness that can create positive changes.

• Would you give up your religion to marry the man you love?

Answer: (Ahem, eto na ang moment of truth.) At the moment, I can confidently say that I am in a position in which I could decide to just let go of the person that I love because I definitely cannot give up my religion, nor will I ask anybody, even the person that I love to give up his because that would be like saying to love me first before his God. However, we cannot fathom love's capacity to bridge differences, even faith. But when the time comes (Hindi na 'to pang-beauty queen na sagot, nafi-feel ko na. Speech na ito. Time's up na! But, I beg to continue...) when I feel a certain kind of love in which I know I could not just easily give it up, then I'd be very willing to keep it against all odds because I believe that love can transcend everything and let me refer to a line in the bible which says, "..and the greatest of all is love." If I feel that what we have is a kind of love that can transcend man's understanding and reason, including the judgment and the ridicule of the world, then, I will opt to pursue that love without having to ask each other to give up our faith, even if it means not accepting the blessing of each other's church. I know that it is against the law of the church and it would give me so much pain and heartache not to have the blessing of my church but on the other hand, it is also my strong belief that faith is an individual experience. So, if my time comes to personally come face to face with God and He asks me, "Why did you have to do it my child?", I know that He is an all-knowing and greatly gracious God that he would still embrace and welcome me to share His full glory despite having to break a rule of His church when I would answer Him, "My father, it's because I loved." (char!)

Hay, tantanan na sabi itong Q and A portion. Kung Miss Universe 'to o kahit simpleng Miss Baranggay lang, tiyak walang pasok kahit isa sa mga sagot ko. Kasi kadalasan, hindi ako one-liner answer kung mag-isip. At kasi, kapag na-ibuka ko na ang bibig ko at may na-insert ako na topic na feeling ko eh magandang i-explain further, talagang magsu-sway ako sa original answer ko (Kagaya nito, sinimulan ko sa English ang blog pero mukhang magtatapos yata sa Filipino.). Eh, hindi naman ito article na puwedeng i-edit at i-proof read, Q and A portion siya sa beauty pageant. At isa pang kasi, kasi mahilig akong sagutin ang mga tanong ng isa pang tanong. At last na talagang kasi, kasi 'pag umandar ang pagiging kritikal ko, baka masagot ko ang nagtatanong nang, "There are some questions that don't need to be answered. I think this is one of those." Pag nagkaganun, mas malaking isyu pa ang aabutin ko, mas malaki pa kesa sa pagkakaroon ng mga interpreters sa Miss U.

In short, hindi lang talaga ako pang-beauty queen material. 'Yun lang 'yun. That's all, thank you very much. =)

*Note: Ito ang kinalalabasan kapag sobrang antok at bored sa pag-proctor sa exam at alam mong hindi ka naman talaga kailangan dun kasi nga, nandun na ang mga "tamers of the raging lions". Kaya, inaliw ko na lang ang sarili ko sa pagsulat nito.